Real Conversations About Being a Vegetarian

Real conversations I have had countless times with various people in the many years I have been a vegetarian:

person: just wait until you've been a vegetarian for a while. After a few months I bet you'll change your mind.
me: I have been a vegetarian for 5-10-13-15-18-20 years (depending on what year the person asked me this.

person: just wait until you have children, you HAVE to eat meat during pregnancy.
me: I have 3 children (most people assume I'm in my 20s and don't have kids. Still! I'm 35 years old, people!

person: I HAVE to feed my kids meat. If your kids come over then they'll just eat what we're having, I'm not making a special meal.
me: No, you don't have to feed your kids meat and I will send food with the kids so you don't have to do anything extra. No? ok, my kids won't be coming over. Yours are always welcome at my house.

person: Just take the pepperoni off the pizza, damn!
me: I am a vegetarian. I do not eat meat or meat juices. Really, it's no big deal.